The first time I played Cult of the Lamb, I thought, “Ah, yes. A game where I can be both the messiah and the menace.” And I was absolutely right. Cult of the Lamb is what happens when someone throws Animal Crossing, Hades, and a questionable amount of eldritch horror into a blender, then sprinkles in a dose of dark humour for good measure. The result? A game that makes you giggle while you sacrifice your followers to the cosmic void.

The Story: A Lamb on a Mission

You start off as an innocent little lamb about to be sacrificed by a group of sinister bishops known as The Four Bishops of the Old Faith. These charming individuals have essentially taken it upon themselves to prevent the return of a godlike entity called The One Who Waits. Spoiler: They fail miserably. Instead of being permanently sacrificed, you’re saved by said god, who tasks you with forming a cult in their honour and taking sweet, vengeful revenge on the bishops who tried to off you in the first place.

From there, it’s all about building your own cult, gaining followers, and keeping them in line through a delightful mix of sermons, rituals, and the occasional necessary execution. What makes the story work is its wonderful balance of morbid themes with an utterly adorable aesthetic. Your cultists are wide-eyed woodland creatures, shuffling around your growing settlement with unwavering devotion—until you decide they need to be turned into soup.

Gameplay: Roguelike Crusades Meet Village Management

Cult of the Lamb cleverly blends two different genres—roguelike dungeon crawling and cult management simulation. On one side, you’ve got the combat-heavy ‘crusades,’ where you venture into different regions to fight eldritch monstrosities, take down heretical enemies, and recruit new followers. On the other side, there’s the home base where you get to run your cult with all the ethical flexibility of a power-hungry deity.

Crusades: Each dungeon run has you hacking, slashing, and dodging your way through procedurally generated rooms filled with enemies, minibosses, and opportunities for loot. You get randomised weapons and curses (essentially magic attacks), and combat feels snappy, responsive, and satisfying. There’s a definite Hades-like quality to it, but with an eerie, cartoony charm that keeps it from feeling like a carbon copy.

Cult Management: Back at home, your cult needs tending to, and by ‘tending to,’ I mean making sure they’re fed, loyal, and not succumbing to illness or dissent. You can hold sermons to boost their faith, perform bizarre rituals like mass marriages or forced fasts, and even declare doctrines that shape your little religious empire. Want to build a cult based on cannibalism and self-sacrificing loyalty? Go ahead. Prefer a more peaceful, utopian commune? Also an option—though where’s the fun in that?

Oh, and let’s not forget one of the game’s most important mechanics: cleaning up after your followers. Because apparently, they just relieve themselves wherever they please. Forget demonic corruption; the real enemy is food poisoning.

The Aesthetic: Cute but Deeply Unsettling

One of Cult of the Lamb’s biggest strengths is its aesthetic. Massive Monster somehow made a game where you can perform blood-soaked rituals while everything still looks like a charming children’s book. The hand-drawn, 2D animation style is both eerie and adorable, and the contrast between the cutesy animal cultists and the horrifying eldritch abominations works perfectly. It’s the kind of game where you’ll be smiling at how sweet everything looks while simultaneously sacrificing your most loyal follower to extend your own life.

Random Fun Facts & Easter Eggs

• You can pet your followers. Yes, really. Just because you might be planning to throw them into a pit of fire later doesn’t mean you can’t give them a little head pat first.
• There’s a Twitch integration that lets streamers have their viewers become followers in their cult—who can then be sacrificed for fun (or vengeance, depending on how the chat feels about things).
• The game lets you unlock different fleeces that change up gameplay mechanics, allowing for challenge runs that alter the way faith and combat work. Want to deal double damage but take double damage in return? There’s a fleece for that.
• The devs have continued updating the game post-launch with free content, including new followers, buildings, and even additional difficulty settings for those who really enjoy suffering.

Final Thoughts: Join the Cult. You Know You Want To.

Honestly, Cult of the Lamb is a masterpiece of genre-blending chaos. It’s darkly hilarious, surprisingly deep, and absurdly fun whether you’re going on a crusade or deciding which of your followers looks particularly tasty today. The rogue-lite elements keep the combat fresh, while the cult management sim offers endless opportunities for ridiculous power trips. It’s one of those games that constantly tempts you to do terrible things, then pats you on the head for being an excellent little cult leader.

So, if you’ve ever wanted to run your own eldritch doomsday cult but were worried about the logistics (or the legal repercussions), Cult of the Lamb has you covered. Now, if you’ll excuse me, my followers are looking a little too comfortable. Time for a sermon. And maybe a little, tiny bit of ritual sacrifice. For the greater good, of course.